Searching For The Holiday Spirit

The spirit of the holidays shows itself in unexpected ways. It's all around us, just waiting to be noticed in the midst of the hustle and bustle of last minute errands, cooking and cleaning. It's at on an early Saturday morning, where perfect strangers smile at each other and say "Happy Holidays" as they pass in aisles. It's at the drive-through when the car in front pays for the order behind them, and it's even at the Benny's in North Smithfield where they have had anonymous "elves" paying off lay-aways for perfect strangers. 

I hear from a lot of parents at this time of year, asking for input on how to create a holiday season filled with magic and joy for their children, without emphasizing the "gift" part of the holiday.

The funny thing is, you don't hear from kids asking how to make the holiday more "magical" — it already IS for them. They have not had time to become jaded, or stressed by bills and other obligations. They see the holiday for what it is — yes, gifts — but also much more than that. There is magic and mystery in this season; there are parties and friends and family — fun foods, and clear, cold night skies full of stars — and sometimes a magical dusting of the white stuff. This is what kids remember.

Let your memory go back to your own childhood for a minute to recall some positive memories. You may remember the year you received a great gift — but I'm willing to bet that it's easier to remember the quieter moments of unexpected magic. 

These "Layaway Elves" are adults helping others, and I'll bet this action has helped them to recapture some of the magic from their childhood. There are so many ways to give yourself and your children meaning during this time of year. In my opinion, the real magic occurs when people stop to assess what the holidays mean to them, and think of fellow neighbors, friends and perfect strangers.

I wonder if we could involve our children in these acts, and begin to lay the foundation for a natural inclination to be elves — not just during the holidays, but year round. Some people call this magic, I call it miracles, happening every day — done by people just like you and me. I'm willing to bet that these layaway elves were not very rich. I even found myself falling into that trap, thinking "Yes, someday, when I have lots of money, I will do that, too."

In fact, we can all create our own little magic, just as meaningful, without spending all the money we have. Here are a few ideas for ways to help some of our neighbors in Johnston. And although you may help them, don't be surprised if even doing one of these activities with your kids helps YOU and your family, too.

1) There are particular items that our local food pantries are always in need of: The Rhode Island Community Food Bank has a great list on their website. Pick up some of these items and take them directly to one of the local food banks that serve Johnston residents. Call first to make sure someone is there to receive your donation.

St. Robert's Food Closet — Bill Holtmann & Joanne Miele: (401)231-4987
1804 Atwood Ave.
Johnston

Johnston Seventh Day Adventist — Charlotte Gilbert: (401)934-2310
2693 Hartford Ave.
Johnston

Tri-Town Community Action Agency — Bill Morrissette: (401)519-1916
33 Maple Ave.
North Providence 

St. Alban's Church Food Pantry — Linda Strocky: (401)231-4016
1964 Smith St.
Centerdale

2) Sing or line up a holiday craft project with the residents at one of the local assisted living facilities, like or . Contact the Activities Director at each facility to arrange your visit.

3) Create a "Holiday Care Package" for a four-legged friend: According to the Providence Animal Rescue League, they are in particular need of peanut butter (to put inside puppy toys), fleece blankets and wet and dry food. Young kids, or those who love animals, will enjoy putting together a little gift for some residents a rescue center and dropping it off. You could even put the items in a stocking, or include a holiday themed toy with it.

4) St. Mary's Home for Children in North Providence has asked for DVD movies for their children. This is an easy item to pick up during your last-minute shopping, or better yet, go through your collection and share some of your favorite, kid-appropriate flicks. 

You can also create your own opportunities — here are some ideas: 

• Do you know a family who needs hats, gloves or coats? Purchase new or gently used items and leave them on their doorstep with a silly note from their Secret Santa.
• Random Acts of Kindness: Go ahead, pay for the coffee for the person in line behind you, leave a scratch ticket on someone's windshield, or even write a holiday card from "anonymous" and put in the mailbox of an elderly neighbor — the trick is to not get caught! Kids will LOVE helping pull off these "sneaky" acts of kindness.
• Secret Wreaths: Wreaths are starting to come down in price, now that the holidays are here — negotiate a discount with a local seller, and leave a wreath on the car or doorstep of a neighbor or stranger. I'll never forget the year someone gave us an American flag in the same way on the 4th of July. It was a wonderful surprise!

Or consider doing one (or more) of the following:

• Declutter ahead of Santa's visit — and donate items to the Salvation Army store on Smith Street in North Providence.
• Create cards for elderly or other children.
• Purchase a toy for a child in the hospital
• Get a new holiday style and give your ponytail to Locks of Love
• Volunteer to read a holiday story at a library, shelter or school and have your child along as your “Helper Elf.”

And if you're looking for a story to read, here are a few suggestions:

• The Gift of the Magi, O’Henry
• Thanks to the Animals, Jan Brett
• Chicken Soup for the Soul: Christmas Treasury for Kids (compilation)
• The Cole Family Christmas, Jennifer Bryan

The warmth and joy that comes from giving selflessly, helping joyfully and living meaningfully is a true gift that will outlast anything under the tree — I promise.